In searching for an apartment that allows small pets (we’ll ignore the fact that Emmy weighs more than most two-year-old children), has, at the very least, a washer/dryer hook-up, and isn’t in super-duper-creeptastic part of town, a I have been thrown a crazy idea…
I should just buy a house.
That pattering you hear? Oh, that’s just my brain running away with the spoon, or jumping over the moon with a cow, or something else from a children’s lullaby that you just know was created while the lullaby-writer was on an acid trip.
So, just out of curiosity, I started looking at realtors websites with the mindset of, “oh, I can’t afford any of the houses in this area, they’ll all cost over $150,000 and that’s just a laughable number to me, the girl who keeps her change in a Gringotts’ piggy bank, lalala.” But, no. There are some cheap-ass houses in this area. I found two that I liked the looks and location of. One was $98,000 and the other was $48,800. And they both had at least two bedrooms and big kitchens and one of them even had a basement. Seeing as how the town I live in is built on top of a cave system, having a basement is a big fucking deal.
Still thinking it was a totally ludicrous idea, I called my mom, because deep down, I really like the idea of a house and being able to paint the walls whatever crazy ass color I want and be able to drill holes in the wall and have tacky light switch plates where the light switch is a dude’s doodle and all that. But I know the best way to have myself knocked back to reality is to tell my mom my silly scheme.
SHE WAS TOTALLY BEHIND THE IDEA!
What the hell? I needed a voice of reason, not encouragement. It’s a truth, generally acknowledged, that whenever I have an idea, someone really needs to discourage me from it as soon as possible. Because my ideas can get a little out of control at alarming rates.
Considering that our lease is up at the end of August and it is currently July 15, there’s no way in hell I could find a house to buy and have everything taken care of before getting booted of my current dwellings. So, the house thing is a no-go this year. But I seriously may start looking for something next year. Even though I don’t want to live in this town forever. But, at the same time, I really want to paint some walls.
And I want an inappropriate light switch plate, dammit.
Yes, these are the only kinds of things I consider when it comes to purchasing a house. Homeowners’ insurance, appliances, and asbestos be damned.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go back to searching Craigslist and the classifieds for a place to live. Wish me luck.
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
Maybe ask your landlord if you can do a month-to-month while you look?
There was this house on 12th street that’s been for sale forever – the yellow one. It’s sort of ramshackle and falling down but I say you put some work into it. Great location. It was only like $112K.
Ooooor this one? http://1302state.com/Home.html
If that house on State Street wasn’t, like, $400,000, I’d be all over it. I get serious lust for it every time I go buy there.
And the one on 12th – is that a Victorian type house too? Because if that house is $112k, I’d seriously consider it. Not that I can afford a $112,000 house, but IT’S SO PRETTY.